The Microsoft Email Tracking System Is A Hoax

Last significant update: 26 February, 2001

This information can be freely reproduced in any medium, as long as the information is unmodified.

Thanks to James Lacey, Ph.D. for first bringing this to our attention on 07 May, 1999.

This hoax is in effect a pyramid scheme in reverse. Here is the standard text, along with my comments:

 
> Netscape and AOL have recently merged to form the largest internet
> company in the world.  In an effort to remain at pace with this giant,
> Microsoft has introduced a new email tracking system as a way to keep
> Internet Explorer as the most popular browser on the market.  

No such software exists, and I doubt it ever will... outside of organizations like the NSA, anyway.

> This email is a beta test of the new software and Microsoft has generously
> offered

My my. I do believe this is the very first time I've seen "Microsoft" and "generous" in the same sentence. I'm startled that we haven't seen a matter-antimatter interaction....

> to compensate those who participate in the testing process.  For each
> person you send this email to, you will be given $5.  

There's a sucker born every nanosecond....

> For every person they give it to, you will be given an additional $3.  For
> every person they send it to you will receive $1.  

Excellent news. I'll run off and submit my two week's notice right now.

> Microsoft will tally all the emails produced under your name 
> over a two week period and then email you with more instructions.  

Seriously now: let's think about this a bit. Suppose I send to 2 people, each of whom sends to two people, and so on. Then:

I get paid $5/person * 2 people = $10 for the first round.

Each of those folks send to 2 people, or 4 folks total. So I get $3/person * 4 people = $12 for the second round

Now each of those 4 people send to 2 each, for 8 more people That's $1/person * 8 people = $8 on the third and last round for me, so

I get paid a total of $30.

Note there is only me at the beginning (2 to the 0 power, represented 2^0). At the first round, there are 2 people (= 2^1) for a total of 1 + 2 = 3 (= 2^2 - 1). At the second round, 4 folks are participating (= 2^2), and all together there are 1 + 2 + 4 = 7 = (2^3 - 1) people.

In general, there are [2^(n+1) - 1] people involved at the nth round. Trust me, or email me if you want a mathematical proof.

Let's suppose this goes on for 9 rounds. Then that's 2^10 -1 people who will each be paid $30, or 1023 * $30 = $30690.

That's rather a lot of email, but Microsoft might be able to afford it.

How long does it take to send out 2 emails, 10 times over? Perhaps half a day?

What if I sent out 10 messages? Then there would be 10^10 - 1 players after 9 rounds, or 10,000,000,000 - 1 = 9,999,999,999 people. Each would get paid $5/person * 10 people = $50 for the first round, $3/per person * 100 people = $300 for the second round, and $1/per person * 1000 people for the third round, so each player gets $1350. All in all...

The total is $13,499,999,998,650.00. According to the U.S. National Debt Clock (leaving our site) as of 05/17/99 at 11:07:44 PM PDT, the U.S National Debt is $5,579,260,010605.58.

That implies that Microsoft is offering to pay over twice the U.S. National Debt, if this email hoax were true and ran merely 9 rounds!!!

I don't think so.

Even if I didn't get perfect compliance by everyone continuing to forward, the numbers get astronomical in a hurry, and of course I could forward to more than just 10 folks....

> This beta test is only for Microsoft
> Windows users because the email tracking device that contacts Microsoft
> is embedded into the code of Windows 95 and 98.

Good. We'll use that email to track down the hoaxter and string him up by his toes when MS doesn't pay.

> _______________________________________________________________
> Get Free Email and Do More On The Web. Visit
> http://www.msn.com 
> I know you guys hate forwards.  

No, we just hate YOU, you pathetic luzer hoaxster. [Actually we just pity them, but it's another chance to poke fun at them.]

> But I started this a month ago because I
> was short on cash.  A week ago I got an email from Microsoft
> asking me for my address.  I gave it to them and yesterday I got a check
> in the mail for $800.  It really works.  I wanted you to get a piece of
> the action.  You won't regret it.

Unattributed, of course. Typical hoax nonsense. Feh!

Microsoft has now debunked this, too (leaving our site). [No thanks to Microsoft for changing the URL unannounced. Grrrr.]

Please do not forward this -- or any other hoax -- to all your friends.

Instead, you should reply to the sender -- and as far back up the email chain as you have energy -- informing the originators that this is a hoax. For this particular hoax, I suggest that you provide a pointer to this URL (http://www.umich.edu/~virus-busters/hoaxes/mstrak.html)
For virus or hoax info, please see our main page (http://www.umich.edu/~virus-busters/) or go to another reputable site, like DataFellows (leaving our site).

   -BPB

visits to this page since 17 May, 1999 23:35 EDT